I am the Egg(myn)

I have accumulated decades-worth of vastly different kinds of tools during my ever-deepening, lifetime quest to try to understand myself and others. I have tools to clarify the mind, tools to open the heart, tools to clear the energetic body, tools to understand the psyche, and tools to connect to spirit.  When Psychosynthesis (finally) found me in 2017, I was relieved to (finally) have a toolbox large enough to hold these tools. I also like that Psychosynthesis comes with its own tools. I find the Egg Diagram an especially magnetic map to follow.

Beyond sages and patriarchy

“Know thyself.”  This simple two-worded piece of advice is intrenched in our lexicon, yet… do you know the author of this adage? I didn’t stand solid in my knowing, so, I googled it on Wikipedia. I learned that know thyself has been attributed to [a list of] ancient Greek sages.  Check it out.  What you’ll see is a fairly long list of names, followed by another fairly long list of “other usages” – names of folks who used these two words in their “famous works” – each with personal interpretations and new twists on what know thyself means. If you read through the entirety of the know thyself Wikipedia page, it’s likely that you too will land at this same, simple conclusion: we don’t know who to credit when quoting know thyself.  

What most people do know – or rather, what most people have come to agree on – is that know thyself is wise code for: To understand anything about anything, first, look inward to get to know yourself. Go deep. Go it alone. Repeat.  “Know thyself” seems to be the flip side of “who am I”; they are one-and-the-same coin. If you want to figure out who am I you’ll have to go inside and know thyself.  

Or do you?  Although this one-coin theory is normative thinking, It is questionable.  Just as many people ascribe the aphorism “Know thyself” to Socrates, the general public may have wrong-thinking (or at least, missing pieces of information) about how to go about getting to know oneself. 

For example, the general public doesn’t know about psychosynthesis, or the (big-S) Self. I find it interesting that the ‘self’ in “know thyself” is spelled with a small s – know thy self – as in, (in Psychosynthesis terms), the personal self.  The coin, then (from a psychosynthesis perspective), is telling us to know your personal self in order to figure out who you are. There’s no accounting for knowing oneself in relation to the Transpersonal Self, the Collective Self, or the Spiritual Self… just the personal self.  In its very spelling, this currently normative, ancient Greek-based advice is limited.

Another questionable aspect of the one-coin theory is this: it’s a sexist-patriarchal theory.  If you glean through the know thyself Wikipedia list of sages and authors-of-famous-works – those who used the adage + have been respected and written about for centuries – you may notice that they are all men. Know thyself has come down through the ages through the eyes of men.

Men are great thinkers. It’s just that… men think like… men.

Men also formed what we know to be “modern psychology” – non-verbally agreeing (from one psychology theorist to psychiatrist to psychotherapist to another) that in order to be (at least more) mentally healthy and whole, we all need to (essentially) first go inward – to know thyself… and then, change thyself.  This way of thinking has become a belief system, permeating the fields of philosophy, psychology, and mental health – at least, until Carol Gilligan.

American feminist, ethicist and psychologist, Carol Gilligan is a pioneer in the psychological field of gender difference, best known for her work on moral development. Gilligan noted that "[male] psychologists had assumed a culture in which men were the measure of humanity - and autonomy and rationality ('masculine' qualities) were the markers of maturity”[1]. Her research showed that “the feminine voice places more emphasis on protecting interpersonal relationships and taking care of other people… [what she named:] the care perspective”[2].

During a Social and Cultural Foundations of Counseling class, our professor shared another, less known body of work by Carol Gilligan. Each of those male sages and psychologists, it seems, had created a philosophical and psychological standard of knowing thyself – from his male perspective. The male perspective, it seems, did not include how women understand who they are.  Our professor stated that, according to Carol Gilligan’s research, women tend to know themselves through the eyes of others.  This is a radical departure from (what has become) the norm.

Psychosynthesis was also a radical departure from (what at that time was becoming) the norm. 

Into the egg

For more about how to use the Egg Diagram, visit the “Psychosynthesis Trust”

When I look at the Egg Diagram, I see (Italian physician and psychiatrist) Roberto Assagioli’s work including others in his field (at the time, and beyond). I imagine the “lower unconscious” housing Sigmund Freud’s work; the “higher unconscious” housing Abraham Maslow’s work; and the “middle unconscious” housing Carl Roger’s work. The egg diagram explains a more whole view of Freud’s “psyche”. It offers a container where people, theories, and beliefs (that I have studied) fit in: Carl Jung, John Bradshaw, Carol Gilligan, metaphysics, energy; our evolving understanding of historical trauma; religions and spiritual beliefs – so much fits into the egg diagram.

In psychosynthesis, we understand that who we are is a combination of all the unconscious and conscious material held in the personal and collective self.  I see the inside of the Egg Diagram (the personal self) – the realms of the Upper, Middle, and Lower Unconscious – equating to the masculine concept: know thyself.  I see outside of the Egg Diagram (the Collective Self) equating to the feminine concept of: through the eyes of others.   I see the Transpersonal Self, connecting these two, as non-binary/ non-gender portals.

In the egg diagram, the “transpersonal” is depicted as having two portals of sorts: one ascending, one descending; one sought after, one wished to be avoided; one like a birth doula, one like a death doula.  Both ‘portals’ are equal. Both are midwives, birthing us to the same place.  I understand these portals. I know them, through an out-of-body experience when I was age 17, and through personal experience and professional work in the field of Grief and Grieving.

In psychosynthesis, we begin to understand that, through the synthesis of seemingly dichotomous thoughts, emotions, energies… we expand – moving (through the Transpersonal Self) into a version of self we might call the Spiritual Self. When joined, the synergy of know thyself inside and through the eyes of others… gets exciting! 

In all my seemingly dichotomous work – with myself and with clients; with individual ‘travelers’ and groups; through movement and meditation; as a healer and an advocate – I keep coming back to a central understanding of Self that sits equally between inner and outer, spiritual and worldly, being at-peace and being a change-maker. 

I am enthralled with psychosynthesis’ combination of the personal and collective, joined by the transpersonal, and opening to the spiritual – as a way to describe who am I.  I can think of no better way to succinctly describe this overview to others than through the Egg Diagram.

Who am I?

I am Love. I am Source. This is the Spiritual Self.

I am energy. I am part of the Energetic Field that holds all.  I am connected with everything that is. This is the Collective Self.

I am a sense-being – with intuitive and aesthetic sensibilities, and a sense of compassion and belonging. This is the Transpersonal Self.

I am housed in a temporary humyn[3] body, having a humyn experience – experienced equally through a physical body (with physical sensations), mental body (with thoughts), and emotional body (with emotional feelings).  I am made up of parts: a “Lollipop Kid” – full of bravado, male, a protector, wanting to help; a “Wispy Spirit” – wise, feminine, an expression of soul energy, knowing that being open and vulnerable is expansive; a “Little Sister” – young, alone, sad, wanting to be cared for and loved; an “Oma” – mother, nurturer, worrier; “BAM” – warrior, advocate, leader; “Pebble” – insecure. I am made up of these characters and more, some I’ve met, many more I haven’t. This is the personal self.

I am a griever. Grief is beyond subpersonalities. Grief is its own entity, its own weather pattern - also part of the personal self.

I am the eggmyn. They are the eggmyn. I am the walrus. goo-goo g'joob[4].

[1] Gilligan, Carol. 2011. "Looking Back to Look Forward: Revisiting In a Different Voice." Classics@, Issue 9, "Defense Mechanisms," http://nrs.harvard.edu/urn-3:hul.ebook:CHS_Classicsat

[2] Kyte, Richard (1996). "Moral reasoning as perception: A reading of Carol Gilligan". Hypatia. 11 (3): 97–113. doi:10.1111/j.1527-2001.1996.tb01017.x

[3] “Myn” is used as a non-gender, non-binary form of language in the spelling of words such as “humynity” and “humynkind”.

[4] This adaptation of man (eggmyn) and men (eggmyn) is used by Ami Ji Schmid here, in the chorus line of: I Am the Walrus by the Beatles, 1967